Should a Christian Attend a Gay Wedding?

Part Two

Arguments Against Attending

• Attending is Supporting Sin

Paul speaks of those who refused to know God and accept His will. As a result, they turned to idolatry and gross immorality. “For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due” (Romans 1:26-27). Homosexuality is a sin. God created marriage to be between a man and a woman. To attend a gay wedding is supporting a sinful and ungodly act.

• Marriage Represents a Spiritual and Gender Relationship

It may be argued, “If a couple love one another why does it matter what sex they are? Marriage is about more than love.” Marriage is more than just about love. Marriage between a man and a woman is compared to the union of Christ and His church (Eph. 5:23ff). The Book of Revelation envisions the great wedding feast at the end of time, the union of the Bridegroom and his bride. The relationship between Israel and God is like that of a marriage. “For as a young man marries a virgin, So shall your sons marry you; And as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, So shall your God rejoice over you” (Isaiah 62:5). Paul described the relationship between the individual Christian and Christ as that of the marriage relationship (2 Cor. 11:20).

Marriage is more than love; it is about the creators intended purpose for marriage. He created male and female, and He created marriages to be the loving relationship shared between male and female. However, there are restrictions no matter how much one loves someone. A man may love his mother or father, and a sister and brother will love each other. Yet incest is not approved by God in these loving relationships.

• Have No Fellowship

We cannot be neutral like Switzerland in a World War. Paul wrote, “And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them” (Ephesians 5:11). How can we walk in fellowship with the Light and have joint participation with those in the darkness? “Do not …share in other people’s sins; keep yourself pure” (1 Timothy 5:22).

• Honor Marriage

“Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (Hebrews 13:4). How can I honor marriage by supporting “fornicators and adulterers”? Marriage is not simply a human institution but has been given to us by God. This gift begins at the start of the creation with the account of Adam and Eve in Genesis.

“And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Gen. 2:18-24).

Marriage results in the two different fleshes becoming one flesh. When they do, they can produce a child. “Then God blessed them, and God said to them, Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth’” (Gen 1:28). Homosexual couples cannot reproduce.

Those gathered celebrate and honor the “solemnization of matrimony.” Celebrating sin cannot honor God or marriage. A gay wedding dishonors marriage by perverting its meaning. “Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; Who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; Who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!” (Isaiah 5:20).

What A Christian Can Do:

When the gay wedding invitation comes what can a loving and faithful Christian do? First, don’t just say “NO!” To just RSVP: “Sorry, Cannot Attend” misses a golden opportunity. Next, tell them why you will not attend. Try to bring them to repentance. Face to face is best or send your friend a letter, if not text or e-mail. Third, reaffirm your love and friendship. Jesus was a true friend to sinners. Not by tolerance and acceptance, but by healing those who were sin-sick.

Saying “no” to a gay wedding invitation is not the same as saying no to loving them or being a friend. Speak the truth in love. Tell them about the Creator and his creation of male and female and the creation of marriage for a man and a woman. Show them there are right and wrong ways to express love to others. Let them know you love them enough to disagree with their choices. Pray with them and for them.

Furthermore, seek to save their souls. The Bible claims that sexual orientation can be changed. There were saints at Corinth who had formerly been homosexuals. Paul wrote, “do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).

Finally, if you do attend, only accept the invitation if you can go and expose the darkness of homosexuality. Could you image Jesus being invited to a party and not seizing the opportunity to teach the truth. Can you imagine him just sitting there and not being about His father’s business. He was not a shepherd who just sat under a tree and let the sheep be devoured or go astray. He was not the physician who saw the sin-sick souls and did nothing. He came to seek and to save. When the demon-possessed, leprous, blind, lame, and deaf came to Him, He healed them.

During the wedding ceremonies of the past, a preacher would ask “If any man can show just cause why they may not lawfully be wedded, let him now declare it, or else hereafter forever hold his peace.” That is when it is time to speak up and have a bible marked and ready to go. Don’t be a wedding crasher. But be a saint who seizes opportunities. Remember, sometimes the cost of being a disciple of Jesus is that our friends take offense at us.

There is a wedding invitation you do not want to miss. You also do not want your gay family and friends to miss. It is the marriage supper of the Lamb in heaven (Rev. 19:7-9). Do not miss out on this invitation over the acceptance of another.

– Daniel R. Vess