All “Dogs” Go To Hell

As Americans we love our pets, especially our dogs. The idea of spending eternity in Heaven without our favorite hairy canine companions is too hard for some to take. Perhaps this is why the musical animated movie of 1989, All Dogs Go to Heaven, met with such success in the box office movie makers decided to make All Dogs Go to Heaven 2. The question concerning the eternal destiny of dogs has been a theological debate for many centuries. In fact, Pope Pius IX claimed in the mid-eighteen hundreds that dogs and other animals did not have souls so they did not have an afterlife. However, more recently Pope Paul VI claimed, “one day, we will see our animals again in the eternity of Christ. Paradise is open to all of God’s creatures.” This poses quite a problem for Catholicism since it was Pius who to declared in 1854 the doctrine of papal infallibility.

Apparently the debate over the presence of canines on cloud nine is still a hot topic between the Beulah Cumberland Presbyterian Church which is located across a busy street from Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic Church. Recently, they battled the issue on the marques in front of their respective buildings.

1) Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic Church: All Dogs Go to Heaven
2) Beulah Cumberland Presbyterian Church: Only Humans Go to Heaven Read the Bible
3) Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic Church: God Loves All His Creations Dogs Included
4) Beulah Cumberland Presbyterian Church: Dogs Don’t Have Souls This is Not Open For Debate
5) Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic Church: Catholic Dogs Go to Heaven Presbyterian Dogs Can Talk to Their Pastor
6) Beulah Cumberland Presbyterian Church: Converting to Catholicism Does not Magically Grant Your Dog a Soul
7) Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic Church: Free Dog Souls With Conversion
8) Beulah Cumberland Presbyterian Church: Dogs Are Animals There Aren’t Any Rocks in Heaven Either
9) Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic Church: All Rocks Go to Heaven

The Bible does not speak directly or specifically concerning pets in heaven. However, the Bible is very clear concerning those who are metaphorically called “dogs.” In fact, the book of Revelation claims that only those who obey God’s commandments will enter into the gates of Heaven, “but outside are dogs and sorcerers and sexually immoral and murderers and idolaters, and whoever loves and practices a lie” (Rev. 22:15). Obviously, John was not talking about literal dogs, but humans who behave like them. Just look at the list of sinners and note their guilt. Dogs do not practice sorcery, idolatry or lies. All these human “dogs” will go to Hell.

Just why are dogs used negatively to refer to evil humans? To the Jews dogs were wild and unclean animals. They came to symbolize sinners. By the time of Jesus, the Jews even called Gentiles “dogs” (Matt. 15:26). In the Law of Moses homosexual male prostitutes were referred to as dogs. “You shall not bring the hire of a harlot or the price of a dog to the house of the Lord your God for any vowed offering, for both of these are an abomination to the Lord your God. You shall not charge interest to your brother interest on money or food or anything that is lent out at interest” (Deut. 23:18,19). Later in Isaiah the leaders of Israel who should have been watching out for and taking care of the children of Israel were in fact dumb and greedy dogs. “His watchmen are blind, they are all ignorant; they are all dumb dogs, they cannot bark; sleeping, lying down, loving to slumber. Yes, they are greedy dogs which never have enough. And they are shepherds who cannot understand; they all look to their own way, every one for his own gain, from his own territory” (Is. 56:10,11). Those who crucified Christ are compared to dogs according to a prophecy in the Psalms. “For dogs have surrounded Me; The assembly of the wicked has enclosed Me. They pierced My hands and My feet” (Ps. 22:16). In the New Testament the literary motif of the wicked human being called a dog continued. Jesus warned, “give not that which is holy unto the dogs” (Mt. 7:6). In his letter to the church at Philippi Paul warned, “beware of dogs, beware of evil workers, beware of the mutilation!” (Phil. 3:2). Finally Peter compared backsliding Christians to a dog “turning to his own vomit again” (2 Pet. 2:22).

There is no evidence that dogs go to Heaven. In fact only humans were made in the image of God and have an eternal soul (Gen. 1:26,27). The greater concern is not the eternal destiny of our pets, but whether or not we are dog like in our sinful behaviors and wicked attitudes before God. So at risk of offending PETA, I must declare that only in a dyslexic Heaven will there be a doG. But just wait a minute. What about those holy dogs called “Saint Bernard.” Perhaps some little old lady might be able to sneak a Chihuahua into Heaven in her purse. And so the debate continues.

– Daniel R. Vess

Rebellion in Scotland

In order to quell a rebellion in the north of Scotland, the English king issued a proclamation to all the rebel chiefs to appear at a given place on or before the thirty-first of December, 1691, and take the oath of allegiance to the king. Those who did not appear were to be treated as outlaws, liable to execution as traitors to the crown.

Although humiliating, it was useless to rebel with such small numbers. One by one gave way, and all had affixed their names to the paper except one. Mac Ian was the leader of the smallest yet haughtiest tribe. He did not intend finally to resist, but he hoped to be the last of the Scottish chiefs to submit. A day or two before the thirty-first, he started. A severe snowstorm impeded his way, and he did not arrive till nearly a week after the king’s messenger had returned to London. A band of soldiers immediately sought the Valley of Glencoe, and Mac Ian and his followers became victims of his proud obstinacy.

How many in our day hazard their souls, as Mac Ian hazarded his life, by refusing to obey the commands of the King of Kings!

– William Moses Tidwell

What Children are Learning in Church

A little boy was attending his first wedding.
After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?”
“Sixteen,” the boy responded.
His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. “How do you know that?”
“Easy,” the little boy said. “All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said, ‘4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer’.

After a church service on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his mother, “Mom, I’ve decided to become a minister when I grow up.”
“That’s okay with us, but what made you decide that?”
“Well,” said the little boy, “I have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell, than to sit and listen.”